Bill Clinton died and was standing at the Pearly Gates. After knocking on the gates for a while, St. Peter appeared.
"Who goes there?" inquired St. Peter.
"It's me, Bill Clinton."
"And what do you want?" asked St. Peter.
"Let me in!" replied Bill.
"Soooo," pondered Peter. "What bad things did you do on earth?"
Clinton thought a bit and answered, "Well, I smoked marijuana but you shouldn't hold that against me because I didn't inhale. I guess I had extra-marital sex -- but you shouldn't hold that against me because I didn't really have 'sexual relations.' And I lied, but don't hold that against me because I didn't really commit perjury."
After several moments of deliberation St. Peter replied, "OK, here's the deal. We'll send you someplace where it is very hot, but we won't call it 'Hell.' You'll be there for an indefinite period of time, but we won't call it 'eternity.' And don't abandon all hope upon entering, just don't hold your breath waiting for it to freeze over."